Anxious and barely audible, Nikolas Cruz insisted that he "didn't deserve" a glass of cold water or to live after he gunned down 17 of his former classmates and teachers on Valentine's Day.
A few hours after police found him wandering near his former high school in Parkland, Florida, the 19-year-old sat alone in an interview room, telling authorities to kill him.
"Kill me. Just f***ing kill me. F***," Cruz said to the empty room while a detective stepped out to get some water.
In a lengthy confession spanning about 12 hours and 217 pages, Cruz reticently told detectives about his depression, his family "putting [him] down," the times he had tried to kill himself, and the "evil," violent voice in his head that told him to "burn, kill, destroy."