Animal Rescue Writes Hilariously, Truthful Description of Cat Up for Adoption

Mr. Biggles is a cat who is up for adoption at Cat People of Melbourne, an animal rescue located in Melbourne, Australia. 

hey penned an extremely honest and darkly funny adoption bio to help their friend Mr. Biggles, who they describe as an "utter bastard of a cat," get adopted.

"Mr. Biggles is a despot and a dictator, he will let you know when he's not happy, which is often because things are often just not up to his high standards," Brett wrote in the ad.

"Mr Biggles likes his cuddles on his terms, and will sit in your lap when he decides it's time. If the stroking is not up to his standards, he will nip you," she continued.

Though the bio stresses that Mr. Biggles is "not a cat for the inexperienced or faint-hearted," it does admit that he has a "secret soft side." He will play nicely with kittens and even enjoys being cuddled occasionally.

"And now I'm in trouble for telling his softie secrets so I have been ordered to say that Lord Bigglesworth believes he was put on this earth to be decorative and be worshipped by his human slaves!"

It should also be noted that the ad opens by sharing Mr. Biggles' website,, and an email address to send "media requests or applications for slavery to Lord Bigglesworth."

You can read Lord Bigglesworth's full bio over on PetRescue.

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